the new obsession

I don't think I'll be blogging much. Not that I've been blogging much..... but now it's not procrastination or writer's block. I'm painting!!! Yep, painting n' painting n' painting!

I go to bed thinking about my art. I dream about beeswax and brushes. I wake up in the middle of the night with ideas to test out. I get up in the morning and turn on my hotplates - first thing.

Greg built me a wonderful work space in what used to be our living room. He's also producing beautiful, rigid supports for my encaustic painting. I've been so productive that our dining room looks like a gallery now!

Here's a pic of my studio:

and a link to my new website:

http://www.jennfarr.com


Other than that, I'm working on having some shows around town. Contact me if you wanna know when I'll be having my first vernissage.

Yippeeeeeee!

nothing like a looming deadline

I've had my G1 driver's licence for years. It's cost over $1000 in driver training and licence fees to get this far. If I want to get a full license, my window of opportunity closes on August 8. Problem is, I've been behind the wheel for a total of 6 hours in the past 2.5 years. I can navigate through downtown rush hour traffic on a tandem bike. I'm confident making left turns at Wellington & Sussex at the height of its construction chaos. But put me behind the wheel of a bulky, motorized metal cage and I lose my nerve.

Mostly, I need to get over a mental block I've got around the idea of being a "driver". I really dislike cars. I'm a cyclist! Motor vehicles are dangerous bullies to a cyclist. Impatient drivers nearly squash me on my daily bike route. Cars, trucks, vans n' SUVs smell bad and spew hot exhaust at me on hot summer days. Ew.

I don't like what motor vehicles have done to my community. City planners still design our communities more for cars than for people. Big box stores with Olympic-sized parking lots preclude pedestrians. Multi-lane highways speed suburbanites' commutes. Double wide streets accommodate parking. Laneways and paving stones dominate places where green spaces could be.

Even our thoughts have been paved! Think of what it would be like without the distraction of the constant noise that vehicles produce? It's probably hard to imagine as we're so accustomed to the steady rumble and hum. Believe me, it would be magnificently serene!

Yet here I am - wanting to add one more driver to the ranks.

I need to turn in my satisfyingly holier-than-thou nondriver cred and join the licensed masses. ... well, maybe just until I pass the road test. Because I'm still not going to buy a car!

the midway mark

Thank gawd we're halfway through 2006. It's been a year of shite - lemme tell you. Actually, I can't tell you everything because this-here internet thingy is just a wee bit too public. Suffice it to say that mom's cancer, dad's open heart surgery, husband's lay-off & sister's divorce are just the half of it.

I made this smiling dog for a friend who likes pugs. I posted the pooch here cuz sometimes my smile feels just as fake as that Photoshopped grin. This pic also reminds me that I gotta stop grinding and start flossing.

Like a Grizzly defending her cubs.

Well actually, like a Grizzly defending her right to raise her cubs as she sees fit according to her own personal circumstances and based on the availability of spawning salmon and wild blueberries.

A recent discussion on childcare quickly derailed when I impetuously posted an emotional vent on Miss Vicky's blog. Oops. My bad! Turns out there is someone who has read my comments as slagging Stay At Home Parents. I didn't mean it that way but haven't had a chance to address this misperception. The conversation on Offhand Remarks has ended. So here goes nothing:


Hi Liss76

I'm very sorry you took my comment personally. I had been a single parent for 8 years and at one point was forced to relocate to Hull to take advantage of the (fantastic) $7 a day daycare policy. I understand you are sensitive to issues around Stay At Home Parents just as I am sensitive to issues around Sole Support Parents.

We're all just trying to do the best we can for our kids - aren't we?

I'm concerned that you didn't feel like you could participate in the discussion. I would have been far more interested in listening to you, as a fellow primary caregiver rather than accept someone who isn't a child's primary caregiver telling me I've got the right "plumbing" to be a Stay At Home Parent and that I'm only working to "feed the machine". If you feel like having an actual discussion please feel free to post here on my very neglected blog.

the shat is on the fritz

On a rainy, icy morning when I need it most - our William Shatner album is all wrong. The Shat's vocals sound a million miles away while his background singers and instruments come in at normal volume. Kirk, why have you forsaken me?

"Has Been" has long been played on our living room pc. We ripped the album onto the hard drive for easier access. I guess the file must be self-destructing in some kind of anti-file sharing hara kiri? But why today? And, after all these months, where is my original CD!?

salad for breakfast

Mom's in the hospital. We daughters were told not to send flowers. Naturally, at first opportunity I logged onto an internet florist & chose the "Sunny Day" bouquet of Yellow Snapdragons, Carnations, Daisies, Freesia and Solidaster with a spray of Golden Sun Flowers. My daughter insisted on the basket. I know my mom will enjoy these flowers but she still 'won't like it'.

Now I'm up at 5am when normally I'd be snoozing for another couple hours. Luckily, this extreme extrovert is enjoying the quiet of a sleeping household. I'll have leftover salad and boiled eggs on a weekday that would normally see me scarfing down ramen noodles at the office for breakfast.

2 tuesdays ago

I wish this wasn't bugging me so much. 2 weeks ago my mother told me to stop calling her. There's alot of background there that maybe I'll start delving into when I have the time and clarity of thought. But yeah, I've been cut off. Pushed away. Snubbed.

Sort of surprising how much this bothers me. I even dreamt about it last night. Weird.